When Supermom Can’t Save The Day

There’s a moment when we realize we can’t protect them anymore. {Image credit: mandygodbehear / 123RF Stock Photo}

Anyone else been there with your teen or tween? That moment when you want to jump in and protect them, and you’re not sure if you can… or should. Or even where to start?

As a relatively new tween parent I’m thrilled to have my friend, Alycia Morales, share today from one of her recent experience helping her son navigate a struggle.

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It was the end of last school year. Continual teasing had left my son so discouraged and stressed. Because he’s chosen to wait for God to provide a girlfriend and to be mature enough to handle a relationship, the kids at school were calling him names, accusing him of being gay. He’d had enough, I’d had enough. So I vowed he’d never set foot in a public school again. Homeschool Mom would be his hero!

I did it again. Seized control of the circumstance. Tried to rest assured it would be okay. Ignored that still small voice of guidance in the back of my mind. Why do I do this?? Make decisions based on my concerns and ignore God’s leading?

Like any good Christian mom, I’d spent a season in prayer, searching for God’s direction. I kept sensing this verse was part of the answer:

“I do not pray that You should take them out of the world, but that You should keep them from the evil one (John 17:15 NKJV).”

And somehow, I ignored it.

So here I am, six months later, defeated. Crushed. Overwhelmed. Frustrated. And. . . repentant.

You see, as I grew more and more frustrated with my lack of ability to teach my son the things he needs to know to pass seventh grade, I also recalled a prophetic word from when he was a toddler. “Your kids will be all right. Trust Me. Don’t worry.”

As I struggled and lost all desire to teach my child mathematics and history, I realized the mark I’d missed. I’d taken control of the situation and the protection of my child into my own hands and out of God’s more-than-capable hands. What a burden to carry the weight of something intended to be carried out by God!

So I returned my son’s self-esteem and well-being to the Only One who can successfully see him through the turmoil of being a teenager.

I let go so God can do what He does best. I confessed my failure, my control-freak nature, and that I had clearly failed God, myself, and my son. In that release, I found peace, joy, and strength once again.

Which led to the next step: I escorted my son to his first day back in public school. Back to the peers who’d taunted him endlessly the year before. As we entered the hallway, one kid came up and gave him a fist bump as he tried to recall my son’s name and welcomed him back. Another said it was great to see him. “Hey, weren’t you here last year?” came from more than one student’s mouth. My son smiled. And has smiled every day he’s walked through the door since then.

What are you hanging onto that should be God’s to protect or control or grow? Has He promised you something that you’ve forgotten in your desire for all to be well? Take a moment today to reach out to the One Who Sees. Release your concern to Him and allow Him to do what He does best: Love and Redeem.

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Alycia Morales is no longer a homeschooling mom. She is thankful God allowed her to live in this day and age, when teachers can instruct her kids how to add letters instead of numbers. She is a writer and editor and serves as Senior Editor of Inspire a Fire. When she isn’t busy working, she enjoys encouraging women at The Thoughtful Spot. She is happily married with four children, a dog and a cat. She loves reading, taking pictures and turning them into encouraging graphics, and drinking coffee and eating chocolate.

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  • http://twitter.com/dewbailey Diane W. Bailey

    Alycia, I think you have hit the nail. So many mothers, me included, have tried out of love and the instinct to protect have hurled ourselves, head long, into areas that only should have been supervised.

    • http://lauriewallin.com/ Laurie Wallin

      So true, Diane! And it starts so early. My kids frequently tell me “Mom, I’m messing this up, but I can do it myself.” :)

      • http://www.facebook.com/alyciamorales Alycia Johnson Morales

        Hi Laurie! So sorry I’m two days late with replies…crazy life cycle happened over the weekend. My kids roll their eyes at me…or want me to do it all for them. The two extremes. I wonder when it ends…I don’t think I worry about Zach as often now that he’s grown up and on his own. I hope it goes the same way with my own biological children.

    • http://www.facebook.com/alyciamorales Alycia Johnson Morales

      Diane,
      I’m so glad God gives us grace and allows us to give it all back to Him. It’s so nice to know we’re not alone in this thing called motherhood, isn’t it?